When my daughter Taliya was 2, she was a beautiful and joyful light with lots of friends. She was also, and still is, a very spirited child. It was not always easy raising her : the time-outs after non-compliance were upsetting her, and making her distrust me. I did not believe in rewards to manipulate her into doing what I wanted, so that was not an option. A defiant behaviour was increasing, and she was clearly rebelling against the random punishments and becoming more angry. I asked myself: “What am I doing? Do I even know what I am doing? This is what I know : kids who don’t behave need to have a consequence like a time-out.” But there was something deeply wrong with these inherited parenting beliefs and I could feel it in all my being. There had to be a better parenting method out there, and one where I would not hurt a little being. And not feel guilty. One where I would not scare her into not defying, but to care her into living truthfully, compassionately and considerately.
Through traditional parenting, I was hurting her, controlling her, having too many expectations from her, nagging her, yelling at her, disrespecting her and manipulating her. As a result of this common type of parenting, she was feeling fear, shame, anger, guilt and shame. And the worst of all, I was starting to dim her wonderful light. Life will give her undesirable emotions, yes, but it was not to me to make her feel, nor create, those emotions - to the contrary ! It was all unacceptable. So after tons of research and reading, I made the shift : I started raising her with empathy, positive communication and connection. This is still the biggest gift to both her and I. And I am forever grateful for the wise and confident girl she has become as a result. And the most awesome part is that it works ! Most of the time, she is happy to do what I ask ! After the shift, I saw more of her gentleness, her confidence grow, and she was more joyful day to day….it all showed in her!
Maybe you find yourself arguing with your kids too often, yelling, nagging or punishing - or even maintaining an unhealthy and unsustainable relationship with them, and this is how you disconnect from them. As parents, we certainly do not need to feel “arrrrrgh” when we are with our loved ones.
No need to ask them one thing, two things and get the "No, No, No” anymore ! This is a very different dynamic that works !
We believe in kindness, in respect towards children and adults alike, and in patience because everything wonderful comes with lots of it...We have learnt to communicate with empathy, gentleness and feel inner calmness.
Imagine a beautiful relationship with your children…Feeling connected, joyful, peaceful, shame-free...Both you and your family.
So you can fully embrace and enjoy your confident children ! All while they cooperate willingly !
Join me in our community of Connected Parents™ through my ONLINE COURSE™. I have carefully and wholeheartedly crafted it with all my knowledge as an experienced therapist, coach and parenting expert. You deserve it, and your children too.
Attention: This is NOT a normal parenting course and it goes far and beyond ! And it will be a very unique experience!
Space is limited, find out when the next course launches!